Thursday, 4 May 2023

Turns in the Road

Oct 28th, 2012

My mind is a whirl of thoughts, to match the swirling grey clouds in the sky.  Cars and people pass by frequently.  I feel uneasy – exposed.  Though I am not easily seen from the road, anyone glancing up the hill toward the Grove may spot me.  And, anyone deciding to walk up the path will most certainly see me.  My ground has been shaken at work, and I struggle to feel safe anywhere, everywhere.

I attend to the various emanations of Ma.  Communicator has offered me a berry for tasting as I pass by.

After expressing my anxiety at not knowing what will be asked of me by work, I have not settled enough in my heart to hear a clear answer, or any answer for that matter, from Ma.  I am still feeling exposed and vulnerable. All I can hear from her is, "Listen."

Finally, Guardian and Root Ma break through my internal tornado and tell me, together, "Go deeper into the forest.  Find the Ancient One."

I stumble along animal paths.  The path becomes unclear – to match my inner state – and I find myself in an opening of the canopy – a small meadow-knoll.  There is a large Arbutus tree in the centre. Wrapped around her is a cluster of Ma – larger than any I have ever seen before!  There are three large main vines, and as the vines climb Arbutus, they divide out into many, many smaller branches, all twined together into an impressive cluster high on the tree.  I make offerings and introductions.

"I know who you are," she says as I attempt to explain my purpose.
I quiet and ask guidance.
"Listen," she says.  "Listen with your heart."

She repeats this over and over.
A scene of the potential meeting I will be having next week arises in my mind, and her words finally seep into it.  I suddenly realise she means for me to enter the meeting listening with my heart.

When I finally make the connection she says, "Even in the meeting, enter as Mol'farka."

"How best do I respond?" I ask.
"What are you afraid of?" asks Cluster Ma.

 "...That I will not be able to live as I live." I am not answering superficially – rather, I am reaching into the deeper fears, the ones normally more unconscious.  These fears do not always make sense to the rational mind, yet they make perfect sense to the emotional heart.

"Go where you are needed, do what is needed," she says.

Past conversations with Ma and Life-Blood Tree float through my awareness – their gentle urgings that I begin to transition as a teacher to help facilitate healing within Gaia roll through my mind.

"Is this Spirit's way to kick me out of the nest?" I ask.

"Spirit will call on you in every setting – this you know.  Communication and community.  You have many off-spring (students and clients over the years), as do I."

I look at the ground to see many small Ma's in their first year of growth.  Then I look up to the cluster above – so many vines and branches, twined together, with many visible leaves and berries.  The cluster is strong.  Some vines do their own thing, and many have combined forces to make this magnificent grouping on a common path.

"Trust you will know the way."
"Is there anything I can offer you?" I ask.

"Take the teachings to your people.  We need you, now.  We need all of you, now.  Teach honour and respect of "the ways" and come back into balance and harmony. (An image of teaching on the land, at my "dream property" arises.) Do what needs to be done."

I leave Cluster Ma and spy Ancient One on the nearby knoll, and go to her.  After offerings, I see a berry on the ground and place it in my offering tin for planting later.

"Entwined destinies," she calls, even before I formally connect to her.
"All of us, entwined destinies.  You, them (work), all of us.  Hush your worries child, just go in and listen with an open heart."

My heart suddenly feels spacious.  I breathe for a few moments.  Wanting to divert myself from the stresses of the day, my mind turns to an image I have been thinking about for a while.  Plants as organs of Gaia – lungs, lymphatic and endocrine systems of Gaia – perhaps nervous system also.

Feeling or hearing my thoughts, Ancient One replies, "Entwined we all are.  You are the parasites and bacteria.  Some of you are helpful and live in balance on Gaia, just as those microbes which are necessary in your guts.  Some are not helpful and must be eradicated.  Open wounds in the Mother.  She bleeds.  She will defend.  She will evolve as needed.  Will you?"

I pause, feeling the sharp truth in the words, and quietly ask, "Is there anything else you need from me?"
"Spread the teachings," she replies, simply, curtly.

I offer “But I feel my current work is the best way…”
"Imagine there is something more," she offers.

"I must go now."
"Return when you can, child.  More lessons are needed.  You must take your training seriously."
"Is a human teacher wise or needed?" I ask.  She grows quiet.  "Or is this enough?"  I feel a sly smile arise from her.

"Trust your heart to know what is needed.  Do what is needed."

As I leave Ancient Ma, peeper frogs and ravens call after me.  Momentarily, I am lost and do not recognize the Grove from the backside.  Then, as recognition dawns, I find myself before Dead Ma.  Bending to leave an apple core at her base, I look to her fallen-tree companion.  Yellow jelly fungus is growing on it, now that the rains have come.

Dead Ma says, "You will come alive when you learn to listen-with, trust, and follow your heart."

Ravens accompany me home.


Nov 3rd, 2012

The rains come daily now.  The Sacred Grove is awakening with lively moss and lichen.  Adorned One wears the gift of Crow feather, and the scent of obkuryuvannya hangs in the air.  I know I am to journey outside of the Grove today.  I look over my shoulder toward the animal path and see Loner Ma, who lives at the edge of the Grove.

A student in-need sits heavy in my heart, and I ask Loner for her guidance.  I feel a shift in my body, and images of an Eagle pass through my mind’s eye, gliding peacefully through the sky, high above the ground, with a far-reaching perspective.

Then a small delicate plant is shown, living in the forest.   
"Pipsissewa," Ma whispers.

I understand this is the medicine for the student, and take note, with deep gratitude for Ma's guidance.

As I turn to walk away, I notice little mushrooms reaching up out of the forest floor.  With the rains, all of the mushroom beings have been growing the past few weeks.  I kneel down to greet a small grouping of three, and ask if they have any teachings.

"Learn us," they say.  "It is time to know our teachings."

A few steps further, I notice an emanation of the Ma I have not seen before.  I am no longer astounded at this – emanations of Ma simply keep themselves cloaked until it is time for me to work with their teachings.  I have spent hours in and around this Grove.  That this is the first time I am meeting this Teacher, another ancient Ma, is both wonderful and humbling.

Her vine is thick, and strong.  Her base is well covered by moss, and her branch reaches high into the air along her companion tree.  There is a very distinct 90 degree turn in her vine at my shoulder level.
Earlier in the week, I had brought beautiful stones to the students – we sat in circle and oiled the stones with some of the medicated oils we had made.  We added essential oils and rubbed these into each stone, blowing healing prayers into them.  The students were tasked with taking their stone home, continuing this prayer process, and then gifting the stone somewhere in Nature during the coming days, where it will act as a placeholder of energy and a carrier of these prayers.

I make an offering of hair at the base of the Turn-in-the-Road Ma, and then place my ceremony stone at her base.

I feel somewhat disconnected – the sound of rain is somehow distracting, and my own thoughts about tasks for the day ahead keep intruding.  I do my best to quiet my mind so I can receive Turn-in-the-Road's guidance.

"Communicate the medicines to your student-in-need.  The rest is her choice.
Your path as Mol'farka is clear – how you choose to manifest it is up to you."

Images of teaching in various settings play through my mind’s eye. A feeling arises in my heart – a confirmation – that if I did not follow this directive from the Spirits, there will be consequences. 

Then images of the property are given, with suggested summer teachings on the land...

"Learn more local medicine plants, and the mushroom folks," Turn-in-the-Road says.

"It is critical.  It is time.  You have everything you need.  You have been given an opportunity to manifest this dream, this healing.  It is now, it is now.


Sometimes we make radical turns in the road, yet it is still one path, one cohesive life.  It is time. Follow your heart."


 

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