May 11th, 2013
I have the day to myself today. I set my intention to hunt for Yarrow and Sheppard’s Purse to stop the incessant bleeding. I know I am low in iron, and stressed. My womb is spilling her red waters – there is not enough earth in my blood to hold back the flow which comes every day now.
I re-braid my front braids with a prayer. "May I trust myself enough to show both my strength and vulnerability, and remain in my centre as I do so."
Completing my braids, I envision the Great Mother, shimmering in the sun, glistening with different iridescent colours. "May I embody the shimmering Mother, who radiates all aspects of herself with ease while remaining fully rooted in her centre."
Choosing to take time for a small Prayer Fire, I gather what is needed and light paper, twigs of Ma, a leaf of Dark Ma, Sage, Tobacco, and resins. Flames begin to dance. My prayer is simple. "May I release any remaining baggage and transmute these energies to become a clear space for the medicines and teachings to emerge."
I offer my spirit-strings as well. I have worn strings on my right wrist for a year, gifted by Forest-Buddhist monks last summer. With the transitions at this time, it feels right to release the strings.
Tossing the strings into the Fire, I ask, "May I deepen my studies with the Mother, and integrate any teachings from the Other. May our combined medicine thrive and continue to grow."
~*~
I am gathering Yarrow and Sheppard’s Purse near Fairy Ma, part-way to the Deeper Grove.
"Please guide my inner child with the Other?” I ask Fairy Ma. “How do I remain in my strength and centre?"
"Let her come out," she says. "Let her come out, and trust yourself to hold her. And trust him. He is a safe container. Let her come out. Be your complexity. He will appreciate that."
I give thanks and slowly wander my way to Heart Ma. After offerings, I address her.
"Ma, you said to embody the teachings to my core. I feel, though, that I need deepening in the teachings. Do you have anything to offer?"
After a pause, she says, "You are learning, child – interdependence and the connected web are your current lessons." Images of those closest to me – friends, family, loved ones – all interconnected and supporting one another through a web arise in my inner eye.
"Look around you, child.” I open my eyes and gaze at the forest. “There is nothing here without purpose. Nothing without function. Everything – all beings and all interactions – are connected and with purpose. This is the medicine you are learning now.
What is your purpose?" she asks. I reflect on the Other – what is my purpose with him?
"What about the teachings of interdependence, of the heart?" I ask.
"Your job right now is to open, let the medicine flow through as it needs to, Be the medicine. This is your learning-step right now. This is the heart medicine right now. Be the Deeper medicine.
Be the open heart.
Do not close. Open and be the medicine, let it flow from and through you."
I give my thanks and walk to Ancient Ma, asking her for guidance. "How do I convey or deepen the teachings in order to give them to others?"
"Prepare your body so that you can worship the God-force.” She gave images of making love. “Treat each interaction as sacred. No comparison to the past. Be present, worship your partner as sacred, speak to him as an emanation of the sacred. Trust him as the sacred. All of his acts are like the shimmering God. Just as yours. You are the Great Mother, Nature herself. Embody all her forces and expressions."
I feel her words penetrate my heart.
As I leave, I decide to walk to a nearby hill to gather more Mother Yarrow. On my return, an emanation of Ma calls me to her. I make offerings and ask the nature of her message.
"Stay a while and we will talk about the teachings of life."
I look at her shape – so many branches, varying in size and age and path.
"This is the path of life," she says. "You must birth these teachings through you alone, and gift them to others through your being. It is then that the magic and alchemy can happen, as your medicine blends with another's. The time has passed for solo – all must be birthed through the open space of interdependence… Merger and blending. Alchemical transformation. Carry these teachings child."
May 12th, 2013
I am on a medicine walk. Still bleeding on and off, my energy is so low.
I stop and greet Forest Ma, letting her know my intentions – to seek insight about the bleeding and anaemia, and to learn to embody the medicine of the Great Mother as an offering for all whom I serve in life.
"They are the same child. Go sit with the medicines. Gather them. Ask them to come to you and into you, receive their teachings and messages. Heal yourself through communing with them and you will awaken as Ma."
I walk up the long hill, feeling my heart struggle with the lack of oxygen flowing in my blood. I arrive at Grandmother Yarrow and ask for insight.
"Rivers of blood.
Rivers of blood.
Clear the channels.
Clear the channels."
My head feels like it is expanding. "Clear the channels of my mind?" I ask. "What about my womb?"
Spaciousness and energy arise in my throat.
"Speak the medicines, child.
Speak the medicines to those who will hear – calm, concise, clear."
"What of the womb, Mother?"
Seeming to ignore me she says, "These will be your medicines.
The river runs, the waters flow to empty the vessel. Emptying the shame of the past."
And I finally understand her.
"May I gather you Mother?"
"Take what you need, no more."
I have the day to myself today. I set my intention to hunt for Yarrow and Sheppard’s Purse to stop the incessant bleeding. I know I am low in iron, and stressed. My womb is spilling her red waters – there is not enough earth in my blood to hold back the flow which comes every day now.
I re-braid my front braids with a prayer. "May I trust myself enough to show both my strength and vulnerability, and remain in my centre as I do so."
Completing my braids, I envision the Great Mother, shimmering in the sun, glistening with different iridescent colours. "May I embody the shimmering Mother, who radiates all aspects of herself with ease while remaining fully rooted in her centre."
Choosing to take time for a small Prayer Fire, I gather what is needed and light paper, twigs of Ma, a leaf of Dark Ma, Sage, Tobacco, and resins. Flames begin to dance. My prayer is simple. "May I release any remaining baggage and transmute these energies to become a clear space for the medicines and teachings to emerge."
I offer my spirit-strings as well. I have worn strings on my right wrist for a year, gifted by Forest-Buddhist monks last summer. With the transitions at this time, it feels right to release the strings.
Tossing the strings into the Fire, I ask, "May I deepen my studies with the Mother, and integrate any teachings from the Other. May our combined medicine thrive and continue to grow."
~*~
I am gathering Yarrow and Sheppard’s Purse near Fairy Ma, part-way to the Deeper Grove.
"Please guide my inner child with the Other?” I ask Fairy Ma. “How do I remain in my strength and centre?"
"Let her come out," she says. "Let her come out, and trust yourself to hold her. And trust him. He is a safe container. Let her come out. Be your complexity. He will appreciate that."
I give thanks and slowly wander my way to Heart Ma. After offerings, I address her.
"Ma, you said to embody the teachings to my core. I feel, though, that I need deepening in the teachings. Do you have anything to offer?"
After a pause, she says, "You are learning, child – interdependence and the connected web are your current lessons." Images of those closest to me – friends, family, loved ones – all interconnected and supporting one another through a web arise in my inner eye.
"Look around you, child.” I open my eyes and gaze at the forest. “There is nothing here without purpose. Nothing without function. Everything – all beings and all interactions – are connected and with purpose. This is the medicine you are learning now.
What is your purpose?" she asks. I reflect on the Other – what is my purpose with him?
"What about the teachings of interdependence, of the heart?" I ask.
"Your job right now is to open, let the medicine flow through as it needs to, Be the medicine. This is your learning-step right now. This is the heart medicine right now. Be the Deeper medicine.
Be the open heart.
Do not close. Open and be the medicine, let it flow from and through you."
I give my thanks and walk to Ancient Ma, asking her for guidance. "How do I convey or deepen the teachings in order to give them to others?"
"Prepare your body so that you can worship the God-force.” She gave images of making love. “Treat each interaction as sacred. No comparison to the past. Be present, worship your partner as sacred, speak to him as an emanation of the sacred. Trust him as the sacred. All of his acts are like the shimmering God. Just as yours. You are the Great Mother, Nature herself. Embody all her forces and expressions."
I feel her words penetrate my heart.
As I leave, I decide to walk to a nearby hill to gather more Mother Yarrow. On my return, an emanation of Ma calls me to her. I make offerings and ask the nature of her message.
"Stay a while and we will talk about the teachings of life."
I look at her shape – so many branches, varying in size and age and path.
"This is the path of life," she says. "You must birth these teachings through you alone, and gift them to others through your being. It is then that the magic and alchemy can happen, as your medicine blends with another's. The time has passed for solo – all must be birthed through the open space of interdependence… Merger and blending. Alchemical transformation. Carry these teachings child."
May 12th, 2013
I am on a medicine walk. Still bleeding on and off, my energy is so low.
I stop and greet Forest Ma, letting her know my intentions – to seek insight about the bleeding and anaemia, and to learn to embody the medicine of the Great Mother as an offering for all whom I serve in life.
"They are the same child. Go sit with the medicines. Gather them. Ask them to come to you and into you, receive their teachings and messages. Heal yourself through communing with them and you will awaken as Ma."
I walk up the long hill, feeling my heart struggle with the lack of oxygen flowing in my blood. I arrive at Grandmother Yarrow and ask for insight.
"Rivers of blood.
Rivers of blood.
Clear the channels.
Clear the channels."
My head feels like it is expanding. "Clear the channels of my mind?" I ask. "What about my womb?"
Spaciousness and energy arise in my throat.
"Speak the medicines, child.
Speak the medicines to those who will hear – calm, concise, clear."
"What of the womb, Mother?"
Seeming to ignore me she says, "These will be your medicines.
The river runs, the waters flow to empty the vessel. Emptying the shame of the past."
And I finally understand her.
"May I gather you Mother?"
"Take what you need, no more."
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